Higgs' Theme Song...

Anyone who's sat next to me at work for any length of time will be painfully aware of my little singing habit.  Yeah, I sing at my desk.

Nothing mind blowing.  Just annoying little songs consisting of someone's name shoehorned into an existing tune.

For example, when Hannah sits next to me, she gets the chorus of 'America' from West Side Story in the ear:  'Hamina hamina ham-in-ah.'

Kate will be sitting next to me for the first time on Tuesday.  She doesn't know it yet, but I've already selected her theme tune - Black Beauty.  Not because she looks like a horse or anything - just because I like the tune and it works well with: 'Kay-teeeee, katy katy katy kay-teeeeeee'.

My singing is not limited to people in the office.  Dr K is regularly subjected to full blown musical epics about her jubblies and various other parts of her anatomy.  After all these years, she's learned to block it out.

But the subject of my post is not any of these people, but rather, Higgins, the new kitten with the stinkiest arse on the planet.  Stinkier, even then mine.  And I sing all about it.

It all started when I knocked together this little image:

It was a simple case of replacing all the references to things that weren't Higgs with...  er...  Higgs.

"Hey, Higgs, what you doin'? Hey Higgs, where you goin'? Who's that girl? Who's that girl?  It's HIGGS!'

Then I got to replacing words from other songs...

"Go Higgins, go, go.  Go Higgins go, go.  Higgins be good!"

No such luck.  She's an evil little bitch...

"Higgs, glorious Higgs.  Black, tiny and furry..."

"I see a little silhouetto of a cat..."

"Higgly doo dah, Higgly ay.  My oh my what a Higgly day.  Plenty of  cat shit coming my way.  Higgly doo dah, higgly ay."

Because she poos a lot.  Sometimes in the litter tray.

And then of course, I became a bit poo obsessed:

"One shit is not enough, but is the perfect place to start my love.  If it smells strong enough, together we can take the world apart my love..."

And another classic Bond song:

"One golden plop means another poor victim, will smell Higgins' shittering end.  For a price she'll shit on anyone.  The cat with the shitty bum!"

"Don't cry when you smell my arsehole.  The truth is I did a big shit..."

"The house is alive with the smell of cat shit.  A smell that's around for a thousand years..."

 "Smells like Higgs' arsehole..."

Okay, that last one wasn't actually a lyric.  But I thought it made for a funny picture...