Lists

If you spend any length of time on the Internet you'll have noticed that many blogs resort to listing things in order to fill space. I am pleased to say that I am no exception to this proud tradition.

Here is a list of nine lists that probably exist:

Shopping List
This would be quite useful if there was a number of things that you wished to purchase at a grocery emporium and, like me, have a memory that is notable only for it's lack of... um... I forgot what I was saying...

Contact List
This is a collection of the details of people you would like to remember. Again, it is useful if you can't remember things like your brothers' name.

Hit List
This could be considered a subset of the contact list. Basically it's the people that you really don't like and wouldn't mind paying a burly man to murder. Probably best not to have one of these.

Task List
I don't really like these. I mean who wants to write down a selection of the chores that you have to do? Chores! Ugh.

Christmas Card List
Sometimes you need to remember the names and addresses of people you want to send brightly coloured bits of litter to around the Christmas season. I'm not sure why.

Guest List
I suppose if one were to hold an event to which one had invited so many people that one could forget who should and shouldn't be attending, one might wish to produce one of these. Personally, I don't see the attraction.

The A List
In 1972 a list of crack commandoes was sent to prison for a crime it didn't correctly bullet point. This list promptly escaped from a maximum security stationery cupboard to the Bedminster underground where it survives as a list of fortune. If you have a number of things that need to be itemised and no-one else can help, and if you can find it, maybe you can hire... THE A-LIST!

What? Oh. Apparently I got this one completely wrong!

Register
This is really just another word for a list, I think. Mainly used in schools to pick on children.

Listerine
This is a type of list that you can use to clean your teeth. Brilliant!