"Let's go to Woodchester Park," she said. "It'll be nice!"
And it was. It was very nice. Here are some pictures I took to show just how nice it was:
What these pictures don't show is the sheer horror of the 'red' route that we took. The never-ending, always-uphill, stinging-nettle-strewn, muddy, red route.
There was a blue route, which was a mile and half, on which there were no hills. And there was a yellow walk that was a respectable three and a half miles. No hills of note on that either.
And then there was the Red Walk. Which went on forever.
I swear that we were walking for days. Maybe even a week. And at least 75% of it was uphill. Through nettles. And mud.
When we finished it, we consulted the map in the car park and discovered that we had just done the seven mile walk.
It's not that it was seven miles. Well, it was... But that wasn't the big problem. The big problem was that we hadn't consulted the map beforehand, so we had absolutely no idea what we were getting ourselves into. We just arbitrarily elected to follow the red arrows. And because the entire walk was through dense trees, we had no idea how far we had left to go.
And then there was the sign that promised us a bench at the top of what I'm pretty sure was the highest hill in the WORLD!
Bench, my arse. There was no goddamn bench. Just more goddamn nettles and mud and hill!
Anyway, when we got back to the car, my legs fell off and Dr K took me to a pub for a dirty burger.
So, as a wise man once said: "All is well."
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